I've had a couple of people thank me for being so open and willing to share what I'm going through. Trust me; it's not my choice.
I am not a writer. English was not my favorite subject. Give me numbers to play with, and I'm happy; ask me to write about or share my feelings and I panic. My daughter writes poetry. There have been times where I've read it, handed it back to her and had to say, "I'm sure it's good, but I just don't get it." I've tried. Really I have.
Sure, I got decent grades in English. But it wasn't my passion. But after last weekend, I've been writing up a storm. One person commented that I came back with my hair on fire (which would be a really neat trick!). But I've had my doubts. Would anyone read what I'm writing? Would people think I'm stupid for thinking some of the things I do? Would people think I'm stupid for not realizing some of this stuff earlier? Would I be labeled a "Jesus Freak" and lose friends over it? Would I turn people off by some of the very same actions that used to turn me off?
But then I remembered... I laid my doubts at the foot of the cross last weekend. That included not only my doubts about God, but my doubts about myself. Jesus took the burden of my doubts upon himself. I don't have to worry about them anymore. As long as I trust Him, I have no reason to doubt myself.
So why am I writing all of these notes? Because I am compelled to. God is pushing me to do this. This is his plan for me right now. Is there more to come? I hope so. I hope there will be more messages I can share. And I sincerely pray that something I write will make a difference in someone's life. Not for me. Not for my glory, but for God's.
There's a joke about me in the local theatre community. I get teased and told that "it's always all about me." In this case, though, I can honestly answer...
It's not about me.
I am not a writer. English was not my favorite subject. Give me numbers to play with, and I'm happy; ask me to write about or share my feelings and I panic. My daughter writes poetry. There have been times where I've read it, handed it back to her and had to say, "I'm sure it's good, but I just don't get it." I've tried. Really I have.
Sure, I got decent grades in English. But it wasn't my passion. But after last weekend, I've been writing up a storm. One person commented that I came back with my hair on fire (which would be a really neat trick!). But I've had my doubts. Would anyone read what I'm writing? Would people think I'm stupid for thinking some of the things I do? Would people think I'm stupid for not realizing some of this stuff earlier? Would I be labeled a "Jesus Freak" and lose friends over it? Would I turn people off by some of the very same actions that used to turn me off?
But then I remembered... I laid my doubts at the foot of the cross last weekend. That included not only my doubts about God, but my doubts about myself. Jesus took the burden of my doubts upon himself. I don't have to worry about them anymore. As long as I trust Him, I have no reason to doubt myself.
So why am I writing all of these notes? Because I am compelled to. God is pushing me to do this. This is his plan for me right now. Is there more to come? I hope so. I hope there will be more messages I can share. And I sincerely pray that something I write will make a difference in someone's life. Not for me. Not for my glory, but for God's.
There's a joke about me in the local theatre community. I get teased and told that "it's always all about me." In this case, though, I can honestly answer...
It's not about me.
No comments:
Post a Comment